John

Oh, what I'd give for a thousand years, but the physical interferes
Every day more, O my Creator...
Oh, what is the piont of the strongest heart
in a body that's falling apart.
A serious flaw... Evita

John died Friday, at 1:50 pm.

I have had 23 years to prepare for this day, and it is still so shocking, sad, and unspeakable. I can't even look at my facebook. It is too upsetting.

What is this doing on my health blog? I'll tell you.

I hate that I was too sick to go down and say goodbye.

I hate that I am missing his Memorial Service at this moment, again because I am too sick to travel.

I hate that I will probably miss his burial less than 3 hours away, because he is being buried Novamber 3rd, and I will still be recovering from surgery.

I hate that all my noble threats to cancel my surgery to be able to go are silenced by my discomforting throbbing of the cysts.